jokes and more 3

1. There once was this man who worked in a pickle factory, who had this very great and powerful desire to put his p. in the pickleslicer. This went on for years, and he couldn't stand it, so he decided to seek professional help for this odd infatuation of his.

He spends a few months with the shrink, and the doc finally gives up and tells the man that since his desire is so powerful to put his p. in the pickle slicer, the only way to get over it was to do it. The man gladly agrees and says he will do it the next day at work ...

The next day he comes home from work about 11 AM. His wife is very worried and asks what happened. He explains to her for the first time the desire he has had to put his p. in the pickle slicer. And then explains that he couldn't take it any more and today he did it.

She gasps and runs over to him,! yanks down his pants and briefs,only to see his member perfectly normal and intact.

She looks back up and says I don't understand ... what happened to the pickle slicer? " I think she got fired too."


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2. Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees , the sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror. Said his wife ; What's the matter?; Replied he ; The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else.

(*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(*)

3. There's a funeral procession of a sardar going on a busy street. All the sardars in the 'mayyat' are dancing the bhangra and singing and general 'balle balle' is on. The people on the street find it strange that instead of mourning everyone is celebrating as if its marriage baraat. So one of them asks Santa Singh, "Singh Saab, aapka koi sage wala gujar gaya hai aur aap naach rahe ho?" .....comes the reply, "Haan ji! Hai hi baat badi kushi ki!!! Aaj paheli baar ek sardar brain tumour se mara hai!!!"



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4. THE GREAT WALL

A Sardar is travelling to Gwalior by train. In the same compartment is a beautiful Sardarini. They both start talking, and find out that they have a lot in common.
* Both are Single
* Both are going to Gwalior
* Both are School teachers
* Both are starting a new Job at the Scindia School, Gwalior

They seem to hit it off, and decide to be roommates in Gwalior and make a pact
that they would do everything together. So they live in the same house, travel
to school together on the Sardar's scooter, have lunch in the Staff Room
together, return home together. Watch TV, eat dinner share the same bedroom and
... EVEN share the same bed.

The only problem - The Sardarni places a pillow between them at bedtime, much to the frustration of the Sardar, who spends many a sleepless night with this most desirable beauty besides him, separated by the Pillow.

The Sardar's frustration has bui lt up to such an extent that he can take it no more, and seeks solace in Drink. He takes off from school one day leaving the Sardarni on her own - she's quite upset, but makes it home by Auto.

The pact has been broken and she decides not to open the Door for the Sardar when he gets home at about 2 AM - Drunk.

The Sardar knocks on the Door for about 20 minutes and pleads with his roommate to let him in, but she would have none of it. "kitthegaya see" she says from behind the door "sab kuch katthe karan da vaida kita see - aj raat bahar hee sau".

The Sardar replies "jai tu darwaza nahin kholegee, mai deewar jump kar ke andar aa javan ga"

The Sardarni replies "char maheene ho gaye, ek pillow taan tu jump kar nahin sakya - deewar kee jump karegaa"


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5. There's a funeral procession of a sardar going on a busy street. All the sardars in the 'mayyat' are dancing the bhangra and singing and general 'balle balle' is on. The people on the street find it strange that instead of mourning everyone is celebrating as if its marriage baraat. So one of them asks Santa Singh, "Singh Saab, aapka koi sage wala gujar gaya hai aur aap naach rahe ho?" .....comes the reply, "Haan ji! Hai hi baat badi kushi ki!!! Aaj paheli baar ek sardar brain tumour se mara hai!!!"